Dos

Session 2: Rules for Dating in a Small School

(NOT gonna lie.. I break these rules quite often. But it's whatever.)

1. Don't kiss in any small, enclosed space. It annoys everyone.

2. Don't let your boyfriend walk with his hand on your butt, either. It's even more annoying than kissing.

3. If your friend has no date for a dance and you already have one, you must do reconnaissance work and find out who might be available to take your friend.

4. Never, ever, kiss someone else's official boyfriend. If your status is unclear, ask around and find out. Don't necessarily believe the boy on this question. Double check your facts.

5. If your friend has already said she liked a boy, don't you go liking him too. Shes got dibs.

6. That is-unless you're certain it is truly "meant to be". Because if it's meant to be, it's meant to be, and who are we to stand in the way of true love?

7. Don't ignore your friends if you've got a boyfriend. This school is too small for us not to notice your absence.

8. Tell your friends every little detail. Okay, maybe not every detail.

God bless.
Xo, Kayla

A New Series I'm Working On :)

(ATTENTION: All ________'s refer to someone's name that has been taken out.)

Session 1: The Care and Ownership of Boobs

(A subject important to our study of the male humanoid animal because the boobs, if properly deployed, are like giant boy magnets attached to your chest.
Or smallish boy magnets.
Or medium.
Depending on your endowment.
But boy magnets. That is the point.
They are magnets, we say, magnets!)

1. If you jiggle, wear a bra. This means you. (Yes, you.) It is not anti-feminist, girls. It is more comfy and keeps the boobs from getting floppy.

2. No matter how puny your frontal equipment, don't wear the kind with the giant pads inside. If a guy squeezes them, he will wonder why they feel like Nerf balls instead of boobs. And if you forget and wear a normal bra one day, everyone will then speculate on the strange expanding and contracting nature of your boobage.

3. A helpful hint: For optimal shape, go in the bathroom stall and hike them up inside the bra.

4. Do not perform the above maneuver in public, no matter how urgent you think it is.

5. Do not go topless in anyone's hot tub. Remember how _______ had to press her chest against the side of the _______'s tub for forty five minutes when _______ and his friends came home? Let that be a lesson for you. (Yes, you.)

6. Do not sunbathe topless either, unless you're completely ready to have sunburnt boobs whose skin will never be the same again. (Reference: _______, even though she swears she used sunblock) or unless you want to be yelled at by your mother for exposing yourself to the neighbors. (Reference: _______, even though really, no one saw and the neighbors were away on vacation.)

God bless.

xo, Kayla

And As The Night Falls, Clarity Comes.

"We feel the cold. And so we hold. The mental frames.. Of something old."

I haven't blogged in a while.. I'm sorry. A lot has been going on to say the least. And now my summer is just about over and school awaits right around the corner. I've been writing a lot though this summer. However, I've lacked to read my 3 books for AP english. I guess I should start sometime since school starts in around 2 weeks or something. But I get my wisdom teeth out on Monday. So.. maybe I'll read them then. Or do you sleep a lot once they're out? Either way I need to start reading them. Good thing I have Spark Notes for all of them. Boy oh boy am I a little smartie pants :)
I feel as though I get deeper into thought once night falls. I seem to never have much to say during the day but then the sun goes down and BOOM. It's like I'm some lovely genius that has many things on her mind.
Lets see.
RANDOM FACTS.
-In the average life span, a person will walk approximately 5 times around the equator.
-Odontophobia is the fear of teeth. (...awkward is all I have to say.)
-Cats sleep 16 to 18 hours a day.
-Elephants are the only mammals that can't jump.
-The international dialing code for Antarctica is 672.
RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME.
-I like watermelon.
-My legs are always shaved.
-I'm really self conscious about my body.
-I trust only a few people.
-I hate wearing shorts but I do anyway.
-Avian Sunrise will forever and always be my favorite band in the whole world.
-I've lost more friends to death then I thought I ever would.
-I feel alone in a room full of people.
-I think that at the end of a rainbow is a leprechaun handing you Skittles.
-I'm a strong addict to Sour Patch Kids and cupcakes.
-I'm barely 5'1.

I'm listening to Avian Sunrise right now. And I seriously could listen to them forever. If they were the only band I was allowed to listen to, I'd be perfectly content with life. Even though I'm in a sad mood, I decided to try and keep this a tad upbeat. Sorry it wasn't very informative, reader. But I still hope that you keep on following me and reading these. I'll start blogging more.

"Run.. Away.. With me.. Into the night.."

Much Love.
God Bless.
xo, Kayla